I Think My Husband Is A Vampire

A great poem from Marianne Burgess

Marianne Burgess Poetry Blog

I think my husband is a vampire

He never goes to bed,

He stays up watching telly;

Films of horror and blood shed.

And when he thinks I’m sleeping

I hear the front door creak,

And then he goes on walkabout;

Sometimes for a week…

We don’t have any pets now –

They seem to meet a sticky end;

It’s the marks upon their neck

That the vet can’t comprehend…

In our shed there is a coffin

He says he’s trying it for size;

In case he comes a cropper –

Should I hypothesize?

I think my husband is a vampire

His cheeks are lacking colour;

And he may have lost some weight,

He used to look a little fuller.

He says he’s changed his diet

That his taste is more refined –

He now likes a glass of ‘red’

In the evenings to unwind…

He was a vegetarian –

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